What's the Difference Between a Column and a Row?

While on the phone with Sister-Wife at the other location, we were looking at a product that I was thinking of ordering for an upcoming event. Since calling it by the name on the website was proving to be useless, I described the item as being in the first column in the second row. Easy! Excruciatingly Hard.

In case you needed clarification also.

Here, we'll do another one: Find the item in the first column, second row.

Answer: you should have picked the 62 cent, turquoise pen - promo bic twist action custom pen...